This is going to be an interesting article. We don’t often air our dirty laundry online (publicly) for the rest of the world to see. Well…I suppose we do, because that’s where our inspiration to write comes from. I guess we just don’t always come right out and say it. But this post is meant to be a lesson to other Daddy’s or Dominants who may get caught up in the moment and forget this fact.
Yesterday, we were at the park as a family. Three kids, two dogs, Myself…and My little darling princess. So, okay; four kids if we’re getting specific and counting My little girl. We were all having a great time. We bought ice cream, played with the kids on the play structures. Walked the dogs. Your typical park day.
Then, as we were ready to go, I went to gather the kids so we could all get into the car and leave. As I did this, a woman approached Me. She overheard our oldest son (14) talking on the playground, and said that she would be interested in him babysitting for her own children someday. We exchanged information for a few minutes (with our son there), and made sure she had a way to get in touch with him for future sitting jobs.
Here’s where things got a little dicey. My little came over, was standing next to Me, and I didn’t see her. She insists she was there, and I believe her…but I wasn’t aware. After a moment, she left to sit on a bench. There was a bit of commotion going on, and I didn’t realize what all had been happening. I tried My best to move things along, and rally the kids to the car, as it was time to go. When we got into the car, things were said, and feelings were hurt on both sides about the interaction that happened.
The important thing is, her feelings were hurt. Whether or not I was flirting (cross My heart and hope to die…I wasn’t), she felt less important. She was made to feel less-than. Instead of bringing her with Me, holding her hand while walking over to get the kids (something I definitely could have done), I got up from the bench we were both sitting at and walked over to get the kids, and was ambushed by a distraction that made the other person feel inferior and unwanted.
I’m not so prideful that I am afraid to “come out” with information like this, and am willing to learn from My mistakes. That’s what makes a trustworthy Daddy or Dom. I’ve placed so many restrictions on My little about not talking to strangers. How she should avoid putting herself into situations like that. Or come to Me, text Me, call Me if a situation like that arrises. And here I was…doing the same thing. We don’t keep secrets from each other. We tell each other everything. We hide nothing. We’re completely transparent with one-another, and have access to the others’ passwords, phones, and computers. JUST so a trust issue doesn’t creep up into our relationship and put its poisonous venom into our relational bloodstream.
In the end, this post is less about BDSM, D/S, or DD/lg. It’s more about relationships in general. In fact, it’s mostly common sense. Heck, I knew it. I even preach it. But I failed to protect Myself, and more importantly…”us”. That’s right, you heard Me. “I failed”. Daddy’s fail. They slip up. They forget. They’re not perfect. But as more parenting guides will tell you, it’s what you do afterwards that means everything. If you fall off the horse, get back up.
We have some making up to do. I got defensive in the car, which made things worse. I was defensive “because” I had nothing to hide, and “because” nothing happened. I wasn’t flirting. I wasn’t “meaning” to make her feel like less, or that I didn’t want or love My little girl. But by getting defensive, I created an opposite effect than what My words were intended to do. They created doubt in her little mind. She questions why I would be defensive, even if nothing really happened.
To all you Daddy’s out there, man up. Own your mistakes. Accept when you do wrong. The “defensive” card isn’t always the best one to play. If your intentions truly were genuine in a situation like this, it will come out naturally on its own afterwards when resolution happens in the conflict. Take it from Me…getting defensive in the immediate moment of that particular argument was not the right move, and I regret it.
I love My little with all My heart, and she’s the most important person in the world to Me. For those of you that don’t know, we were a vanilla couple first, then discovered a book called “Love & Respect“, then discovered D/s, then DD/lg. And we fit into every single one of those classifications. We’re not one, or the other. We’re all of them. So not only is she My little girl and I her Daddy…she’s My submissive and I’m her Dominant. I am her leader. I am her protector. And yesterday, I failed her. I’m confident forgiveness will come, but I have some making up to do, and her some healing. I hurt her heart, and that’s not an easy thing to mend.
Thank you for reading. If you’ll excuse Me, I have some boo-boos to go kiss.