Punishing Your little is vital and, can sometimes be very hard to wrap Your head around. Deep down, You don’t want to hurt Your little girl because, dammit, she is so fuckin’ cute; but You also feel compelled to teach respect and proper behavior. It is really important to remember that by not punishing Your little, You are doing more harm than good. Every little will test her boundaries, and if she finds that there are none, she will ultimately feel lost, confused, and unloved. She needs to know that You love her enough to teach her how to be Your “good girl”. It is every little’s desire to please her Daddy Dom, and to be praised for doing so.
In the same respect, she is also likely to misbehave (no one can be perfect, even though we try desperately to prove that wrong) and get on Your nerves…often. It is in those moments that Your inner Daddy Dom is called to step up and be the Daddy she needs. Whether it’s bending her over Your knee or privileges lost, You NEED to show her who is Boss.
Men are taught from a very young age, “don’t hit a girl” and “respect women”, etc. It can be extremely difficult when first entering the BDSM lifestyle to wrap Your head around this new taboo way of life. It “is” ok to slap Your girl across the face when she is mouthing off, or pull her across Your knee and spank her until her little ass is bright red. It is finally ok to give in to those hand twitches when she is being rude and back talking to You. People need to understand that a Man needs respect, and without it, He will feel belittled and less than (especially in this lifestyle). How can You assert dominance when she is not respecting You and will not follow orders? Of course, all of this needs to be discussed upon entering the BDSM relationship, to determine each persons limits. Also, remember that it is never ok to abuse her by going farther than discussed, or to ignore the preset safe word. You should always be in control of Your emotions going into a punishment, to protect both Yourself and her well being. You are in a whole new world and way of life. A world where women are itching to be put in their place, and Men are allowed to assert their true Dominance.
By not punishing Your little, You are causing her damage. she loses faith that You are there for her, and she will become confused about who is in charge. We often hear in the BDSM community the term “topping from bottom”. It is my firm belief that the reason this happens is lack of control from the Master/Daddy. When He fails to step up and be the “bad guy”, she feels unsafe and will either become afraid that You don’t care, so she feels the need to protect herself and be the “Big”, or she will misbehave worse by becoming extremely disrespectful, and defiant in the hopes that You will shut her down. Every little needs a Hero, and no one ever said being the Hero would be easy. You will need to step out of Your comfort zone and lay down the law. She needs it, and honestly, craves it. She wants to know that there are consequences and boundaries, so that she can feel safe, loved, and cared for.
Punishment is love. You love her enough to step out of Your comfort zone and teach her a lesson in a way she will not soon forget. Punishment is also a lot of work. There are immediate actions of deciding the punishment. And then there is the follow-through. It is easy to become, for lack of a better term, “lazy”. Lazy Daddies will ultimately have more work on Their hands than a Daddy who is on the ball and administers praise and punishment at the time that it is needed. The lazy Daddy will have a brat on their hands, who acts up over and over. He will be chasing after her, wondering why He got the “naughty little”, and wonders “wasn’t this supposed to be empowering and be more fulfilling?” Both He and His little will never experience the amazing life that can come from a D/s or DD/lg relationship. There is a lot of work that gets put in to make this lifestyle work, but there is also so much to gain for both parties.
So for those Daddies who are struggling to find proper punishments, here are just a few little ones to get You started:
- Early Bedtime
- Ruler Across the Palm of her Hand
- Time Out
- Writing Assignment
- Slap Across her Face
- Eat Dinner Alone
- Extra Chores
- Loss of Privilege
- Cold Shower/Bath
- Soap in her Mouth
- Loss of Sexual Gratification
- Loss of her Favorite Stuffie
- Loss of Favorite TV Show or Movie
- No TV at Bedtime
- Read a Book of Your choosing
- Lecture from You
- Loss of Sweets
- Loss of Furniture
- Kneel at Your Feet for Specified Time
- Loss of Speaking
- Loss of Eye Contact with You
- Loss of Touching You
- Loss of Clothes at Home
- Loss of Internet
- Eat Food she Doesn’t Like
- Go Out to Dinner but she Doesn’t Eat
- Hair Pulling
- Sit Outside Alone Until Invited Back In
- Tied Up While You Do Anything You Want to her
- Name Changed to Something Cruel for Specified Time
- Loss of Makeup
- Ignored by You for Specified Time
- Loss of Dresses
- Loss of her Favorite Shoes
- Eat and Drink Only Oatmeal and Water
The options are limitless, and can be as kinky or cruel as You choose them to be. Always remember to discuss rules, punishments and safe words. littles, listen to your Daddy…He knows best. Daddies, your little needs You to be the Hero, and to put her in her place. Have fun with this, and experiment to find what works best for you.
Please feel free to share your opinions and ideas!!! Daddy and i are always looking for new ways to make our dynamic work even better.